Home (Momma was a Cross to Bear)
Awhile back I was hitting the “random article” button on Wikipedia (very addictive) and came across a very troubling story. I read it over a few times and saved the link. Maybe someday I’d write a song about it. Recently, I found my notes and began to consider doing just that. More research gave me a few more bits of information and clarified some of the misinformation that was out there. All of which deepened my interest in this incredible story.
As I began to write, it became more challenging. It was daunting to try to write about true events. Especially THESE events. I paused writing a number of times. Sometimes I thought I’d never get it written. Other times I felt I just needed to be sure I got it right. But, in each case, I would come back to it within a day or two… determined to finish it. To me, this was a story that needed to be told (in whatever way I could).
Why write a song about this? I honestly don’t have the answer. Perhaps it’s just my way of trying making some sense out of this sometimes hard to understand world. And if a few more people know about what this family went through, that’s ok by me too.
The Murder of Suesan and Shiela Knorr – Wikipedia Article
Thanks for taking the time,
John
March 16, 2009
Home (Momma was a Cross to Bear)
words and music by John Natiw ©2009
Fire burnin’ down on highway 89
Near the Squaw Creek Bridge
I could see those flames and smell the awful smoke
Comin’ up the ridge
Stopped the car, got out and made my way on down
Not knowin’ what I’d find
First a scarf, some jeans, then the body of a girl
She’d been shot then burned alive
And as I struggled with the smell of gasoline
I wondered who it was could do this kind of thing
Home… x 3
Should be a place of tender lovin’ care
Not a den of pain and fear
Her momma was a Cross to bear
Cardboard coffin layin’ in a little field
Just along the interstate
Sinking feeling as I walked along the weeds
Another mystery of fate
She was curled up in some blankets all alone
Wasn’t nothin’ left
She’d been beat, hog tied stuck in the closet of her room
Three days later, she starved to death
As I staggered at the thought of what I’d seen
I wondered who it was could do this kind of thing
[CHORUS]
They were sisters, livin’ with a curse
Just tryin’ to stay alive
She killed the first in 1984
The next in ‘85
[CHORUS]
Dedicated to the memory of Suesan (d.1984) and Shiela (d.1985) Knorr.
We’ll Go (Looking for Eden)
Song #3 for FAWM 2009. Think this one is a keeper…
We’ll Go (Looking for Eden).mp3
We’ll Go (Looking for Eden) – John Natiw ©2009
I’m barely breathing
Under this ocean
With all the commotion
Of waves crashing down
You’re hardly moving
Against this strong river
Starting to shiver
Refusing to drown
So we’ll go… together
Through the deep valleys
Across walls and canyons
That stand in our way
So we’ll go…
And still we will struggle
Against fate and fortune
The dark of the new moon
And wolves drawing near
But if we are faithful
And trust in each other
Dear sisters and brothers
We’ve nothing to fear
So we’ll go… together
Through the deep valleys
Across walls and canyons
That stand in our way
Yes we’ll go… together
Looking for Eden
In spite of the demons
That lead us astray
So we’ll go…
And someday it ends
This journey we’ve taken
There’ll be no mistaking
The end of our road
We’ll stand in that moment
Covered in gold dust
The blue sky above us
And gravel below below
And we’ll go… together
Through the deep valleys
Across walls and canyons
That stand in our way
Yes we’ll go… together
Looking for Eden
In spite of the demons
That lead us astray
So we’ll go…
So we’ll go…
Thanks for listening,
John
February 6, 2009
A Song About Dying Lives Again
Back in 2005 I wrote a song called One Cut Too Deep. For the longer version of this story, see the post One Cut Too Deep on the Songwriting Apples blog from 2007. Although I was happy with the lyrics and some of the music, I never played it out or even in the basement much after ‘05. In 2007 I took another crack at it, but was still not happy with the result. With a few cool shows coming up soon, I’ve been messing around with it pretty regularly over the past few weeks. After almost four years, I think it may be finished.
The lyrics have changed very little (a few lines are omitted and some others are repeated due to arrangement). Also, there is not a short portion at the end with spoken word (a few selected lines from the verses spoken over the music). The music is completely different though. When I originally wrote it I played a very slow and somber finger picked part. The melody was very simple and repetitive. Also, the chorus lacked any kind of punch, in my opinion. Last night I sat down with my guitar capo’d at 5 and began to play different chords in a much quicker and rhythmic manner. As I began to sing the lyrics to see if they would fit, they came out very easily. After recording a few takes I listened back and liked what I heard.
Today I listened again to the rough recording and decided to record it for my first FAWM 2009 entry. One Cut Too Deep may finally find an audience. Hope it was worth the wait.
John
February 1, 2009
